Transvestia

I decided to retire from everyday medicine, although I was still treating the members of the royal court, and build my own medical school. I was dissatisfied with the instruction given in the old Temple of Physicians where the priests taught with the methods of both science and superstition. They relied more on prayer than they did on medicine. I felt that the time had come for science to prevail.

Now that I am old and I realize that I am dying I wish to leave to you young physicians the riddle of my life. I believe that in the future you must also begin to treat the mind as well as the body. I reason that my choice of living as a woman instead of as a man is only a very small part of a new type of understanding which you must develop if you hope to be of greater use to mankind.

The whole development of my life rests upon my childhood relationships with my mother. In secret un- til my fourteenth year she would dress me as a girl. These moments were among my happiest. Always her affections were focused upon me and always she was there to blot out the image of my father. I loved her, imitated her, and looked to her as my guide in all things.

Later before I left home for the Temple of Physicians I came to have other feelings toward her. At first these feelings gave me a sense of guilt until I realized that they were never meant to be fulfilled with their original object. The replacement of the original object I found in my first wife. She was crippled and not very strong so she appreciated my gentleness. Our relationship was a mother, daughter, lover mixture which, although it may seem strange to you, gave me great happiness.

You see, I had managed to create a second child- hood with her that contained all of the blessing of my first childhood and more. In the passion of our love I and my ideal were no longer separated-we joined- and I became--in image, feeling, and expression-- my own mother. This absorption lasted from a few seconds to as long as a week. It was both mental and sexual and very very beautiful.

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